Eventide

  

Along the seashore, walking I was. 

The sun as a portrait, sinking behind the swells; 

gloaming arose and I stood gazing upon it,

 like the eyes of my love,

until it hid: eaten by the rising tide. M

 

Raven

You never appear in my dreams anymore, 

why do I keep swimming deep?

I learned to breath under pressure and without light, 

where demons lurk, 

We are foam that quickly fades.

This is my last poem for you, 

I'll cut the ancestral thread that ties us, 

the gods never left us speak,

we are foam that quickly fades.

I guarded our last kiss, I'll cut the ancestral cord that binds us, 

everything will be kept between the wings of the raven. M

That's how I saw you die

 That's how I saw you die

slowly and secretive

engorging

ecstatic inside Alice's world

I couldn't bring you back

and you couldn't come back,

your head turned into a giant mushroom

you didn't try to escape either

it was your hiding place, without pain.

I see your eyes, two moons full of light

walking towards the darkness.

That's how I saw you die

slow and stealthily

gobbled, enveloping you the darkness. M

burning in acid

L' phant

I had a flash of you 

and you found me again,

I thought of you, you said. 

The first time I heard your voice,  

I had a glimpse of you. 

We always see each other throught, 

but we never stay in the middle. 

My eyes, your mounth, desire moves, you said.

we read with a mental touch.

Does the world ever stop turning?

I had a flash of you, 

you found me again, 

and I thought of you, you said. M

I am also a masochist

I can open my soul to you, put your hands in and make a hole in me, 

I predict when you're about to leave,
 I bottled up my feelings a long time ago,
 but not my senses,I don't dare touch you, 

I don't want to break the things that work for you.

You can make a hole in my soul, you would leave a wound that I would sew with all the poems I wrote for you, there would be no tears in my scar. M

Boy of 80's

Sometimes I think, I would have liked to meet you sooner or maybe later, at a suitable time. When we could have saved from ourselves or been less dead. Tell me boy, had I meet you earlier, we can would have felt the same?, I don't know anything about love, we dancing in shadows, is that alright?, tell me your secrets, I see you only in my dreams, or you're the boy who never exist?., I wanna know your secrets, I'll keep it. what I don't know about love?, maybe you're the boy who never was and we're stranded in a time where we cannot been, as if we were in the 80's. M.

Wires

 

Sometimes we can't figure out our feelings, and when we do the moment is gone, we keep it to ourselves, hide it, intuiting that it's not longer in us; eaten by the black hole of fate.

 The pieces have been changed by the universe. M.

Hush

Woods: Isolation branches, hidden shadows digging in silence, growing, moving away from myself, dingy smell his stamp.

I don't know when the mirror broke, but I started to see through it.

Lying on my bed, I close my eyes, it seems like i'm sleeping, open my eyes and the light is dim, close my eyes and open them again, i'm dreaming, but it's not a common dream, I have to run away,  I wish just disappear when I open it the eyes, still awake, this is still here, in silence. 

M.

Fancy boy

I met you in dead of night, we were trying to survive, I didn't have to look twice, you were there, as always, with the music on your side. 

You're a fancy boy, but you don't have anything of fancy, you're invisible like wind, freedom runs in your veins.

I was floating on insomnia in my spirits nights, my legs fell towards to you, on hollow. When I saw your eyes it was between on mine, you're on my skin, and I enter in yours through to the moonlight, in a natural way, like your unfinished heart. M.

Shocking blue love

[car door closing sound]

She knew everything,this love only suffocated her, when they talked, all she heard was, don't love you and I never have, you always stay doing it easy.

[Road started] 

Rolls down the window glass, because she feels she's not breathing, fucking waste of time: thought.

 [¨nothing in my way¨ coming from radio]

He has been thinking, for a few days: I love her, I feel like trash, and now I understand that if there is someone who can cure me, it's her....

You know, H....

In the curve, he steps on the brake, the tires sound on the pavement, they fall. The car is between two trees, he feels dizzy, he blinks to recover, he speaks to her, but she doesn't respond, turns to she, but, there is a branch crossed in her neck with a sad and distant eyes. 

In the funeral, he feel completely empty, no tears, is like, if seeing his eyes that time, they would have emptied all his blood, his heart couldn't beat.

six months later, hangs himself.

Oh, shocking blue love. M.

crapy

 I'm bussy today

all is crap

so, I'm bussy today

I'm going to dissipate

I'm bussy today

all is crap. M.

The other side

 I. Interlude

I had a dream, I woke up in the backyard, wrapped in sharp & pointed branches & the easiest way to escape was to cross to the other side of the yard. When I came out, I could see a big white house & a shadow of a man standing in the window. As the days go by, my dream repeats itself, but the silhouette of the man is becoming more & more clear-cut.

II. Prison

My head in a bag, I passed out. 

III. Conception 

Now I'm inside of the big white house, I can look out the window, but I can't get out. I can scream but, I can't hear my voice. I feel like in a bottom of deep ocean, no light, no sound, except of him.

Him has a routine, so quiet, & don't notice me, but sometimes is in my back, & I can't move, his cold could break my bones. 

He can become like another person, expressions & his movements change, & it doesn't matter if I run, or if I can hide, he always find me, face to face, catch you: he says.

Now, I understand, he knows me.

IV. Departure

While I was standing in front of the window, I touched the glass & it was warm, so many memories came to me, of what it was, freedom. So far away, caged, I let it go all this, all that I was, & all I had, I dreamed of being wind, I run & run, my steps every time become more heavy, but I don't stop, he's coming after to me, I can hear his light footsteps, & now, I have it. Lighters. 

When I burn myself, I woke, in my backyard & in the other side, the big white house, it wasn't there.

Dedicated to people suffering from depression, with love: M.

ShitHole

Never be me.

In the last call, hurt most.

Sometimes, something happen, & happen & happens again. But you don't normalize it & it questions you, ma-maybe that I wanted is impossible, I don't know, but. 

The thing is this: If you man for a minute puts you in second for another woman., every time it happens I think, never be me. And you blame biology, society, religion, perception, freedom, not matter what it is, that isn't right & never will be. Probably when you realize that, it's most likely late. 

And all this time running together, feel like splinters on the tongue because even if you explain it, never knows how you feel, then, stop saying it. 

.

.

.

Reader, u know the final_________________. 

You take the last call, & hurts you most. M

Red Cherry

 Part II

''In general, respiration is nothing more than a slow combustion of carbon and hydrogen, wich is completely similar to that produced in a lamp or a candle that illuminates and, from that point of view, animals that breathe are combustible bodies that they burn and consume themselves''. Lavosier

We live in a modernism world/ outdate

involved in a foul game

red cherry

red sex

privacy is dead.

Awake, you're not weak. M

Red cherry

                            

                               Part I.

Women aren't weak.

I have seen many women get up after giving a birth,

after being hit over & over again,

raped,

separated from their children,

prostituted

We were burned for working,

hidden for learn,

displaced for speaking,

killed for fighting,.

because from eden we were pointed by sin,

manipulated to think that it was all our fault.

They're still keep tightening the rope, it isn't finish yet

& neither do we. 

Women aren't weak. M 

---------------------------------------------------------

Women aren't weak.

He visto a muchas mujeres levantarse después de dar a luz,

después de ser una y otra vez golpeadas,

violadas,

separadas de sus hijos,

& prostituidas.

Fuimos quemadas por trabajar,

escondidas por aprender,

desplazadas por hablar,

& asesinadas por luchar.,

porque desde el edén fuimos señalas por el pecado

manipuladas para pensar que todo ha sido nuestra culpa.

 Siguen apretando la soga, aún no ha terminado

& nosotras tampoco. 

Women aren't weak. M 

My room's ghosts

3. La Fille

I don't have story of her

hides behind curtains

you can see the tips of their little shoes

she appears only in the night

I never had the guts for uncover the window 

but when the kid hidding, something else was close. M

contagium vivum fluidum

Where are souls go?

Clean & fresh water come down the river 
it when does stop? 
I think it doesn't, if you turning back, 

only water you will look, endless.

And it started with tiny drop, hard to find.

Living, it's easy to get used to, but not for the last lock eyes.

There is a question that I liked to ask myself, 

before arriving home. 

That question is, are you ready for die?,

 if the answer is no, must do it best.
 

When I see her eyes, I can perceive that illusion of seeing him enter. My mom's eyes. And He will. With love. M 

In memory for my stepfather, 
July 9, 1955 - November 2, 2020.

My room's ghosts

2 Knocks of the closet 

Likes to give you nightmares,

you rarely see her in the day or speaks

but in the night, when all go at sleep 

you will hear toc toc from inside the closet. 

My room's ghosts

1. Who I am?

I

Where are souls from?

Have you ever wondering it?

I was murdered 

I was almost 17 and smart 

and loved nature, of all kinds, 

can almost say of all kinds.

I would introduce myself,

 but I don't remember my name, 

I only have fragments of me,

perhaps was Josephine or Nancy, 

maybe Jessica, I don't know,

 whenever I hear a new name 

I try to remember if it could be mine; 

I think that's what hurts me the most, 

to snatch what I was once named with. 

What makes it seem that you exist

to have a name.

II

I remember well when I met him

I was upstairs with my notebook of flowers,

 I recollected and classified them, 

I liked to their taxonomy

my mom spoke to me, 

ran to the window and opened it, 

and he looking up.

III

He started to come more often,

my parents used to buy him firewood

and the weather it was getting colder and colder.

one day he stayed for dinner, 

they liked, but I couldn't, 

I could feel something inside him, 

something that could absorb me 

if I got too close.

IV

I had a dream, before my birthday came, 

I was in a field full of flowers,

 and there was a sunflower,

 it looked strong and it's petals were so golden, 

I walked towards to it, 

but it seemed that it was moving away, 

it looked smaller and smaller, 

I ran to reach it,

 but it was getting smaller and smaller until it disappeared, 

just before to  touch it, 

from the tall grass came a golden butterfly,

 got on my nose

 and go away.

V

I went to the market on my bicycle, 

when I returned, my home it was burning on,

 I got off my bike and I ran, trying to go inside, 

I had to see my parents,

 but there was nothing else, just a flames.

Then I couldn't breathe and woke up here.

VI

It's hard to talk to someone since then, 

not many can enter, can't see me, 

and long ago I can't see myself.

VII

He used to cut me, I know he killed my parents,

 even if I never asked him, are those things that you know

 and what don't need to confirm.

Since then, the most vivid memory I have, 

is my dream.

Never anyone else called me, 

never more I came back to hear my name,

 I think that, never more I existed again.

VIII

Few have seen me since then, most of times I'm here,

 where they locked me up, and others,

 I achieve to be outside for a short time 

and I see new things, 

things that I don't know how they work, 

I come back and they aren't, 

everything is timeless, 

we're the leaves that fall from the molting of a tree.

IV

I don't remember my death, every time I think it in, 

I feel on a swing, 

in where each time raise further towards up, 

only that I never more came down again.

X

I loved nature, of all kinds, 

can almost say of all kinds.

In memory of all the unknown people, victims of torture and murder.

.

.

.

I saw her in some dreams, I thought they were just dreams until my 10-year-old cousin saw her (2008). 

June

--Don't just loves for loving, you should loving for wanting, you don't just enjoys for enjoy, enjoy for loving.-- The boy ghost

Have you ever felt an encapsulated emotion?

where you also know that it will stay with you always

it's interesting how it can find us something and always stay, as if, simply will it found you

and it will fit on your broken pieces

answering your internal questions, then you know that you should stay there always.

I felt sparkles that night

When we met. M