l'adieu oiseau

I had a dream, I was standing in front of the mirror, with the same face, what are you now?

In the same paths, but suddenly you're not so young anymore

Do you still do what you love or it's just a memory?. M

Lilac

Hope is a flower stored in the box

Like Schrödinger's cat, time runs

What is it?

Talked to my friends, talked to myself

Humans blame when something makes them feel unstable

But that's not me

Be complicated, said to be my problem, melancholic, suicidal-depressive as surnames

We follow our instincts, we can't blame nature for the fear of our hearts.

The truth, I can't finish this poem

I can't finish something that never existed

Something that just lives in my mind

The only thing there I can do is: start over

& to look at the cat's eye again. M

Forehead kiss

Man, I wish I had things as clear like you

But, you look at me as if expect some of me 

I wanted to give you everything

But, you can't hold my hand

No one has treated me like you

Nobody lied to me like you

Nobody looked at me like you

Why do you say that?

Why are you angry?

Why do you hit, hit my lips

Man, there's a hole in me

& when I look to you again

Something inside me it breaks 

Maybe, my soul is trying to say

How much I really loved you, Man. M

Into your wings

Inside the loneliness of world

I love you, since I saw you, 

nitrogenous bases & bones easy to break,

I'm more fragile than you

I don't need to understand

in this sick world, you are a blessing

forever, my child. M

things

Things that I learned or that forget

Moments that I remembered, songs I sang

what I touched or saw 

When I painted and drew

Things that I deleted or block

All dreams that I dreamed and all I wanted

Things that I said or thought, words that I shut up or keep , 

Things that I did and didn't, when I hit or I breaked

what I read and wrote

every time I cried and kiss

Things that I loaded, pedaled or pull down and burn

When I failed and hurt me

when they hurt me and broke my heart

All the times that I wish you were here

All times that I cook, ate and throw up

Things that I cleaned

what I hear or smelled

Things that I bought

when I loved or  I hated

Things in that I believed 

when I manipulated and lie

All the times when I felt whatever

All persons that I conquered, and fell in love

Games I played and won

Things that I made me feel sick

Poems that I composed and correct

Thing that I photographed and memorizing

All that times I danced and kicked

Things that I searched and found or lost

Things that I lived

with all ghosts that I saw

- Do you think it worth your shit? 

- Do you think it worth all shit of the world?

it's just a moment, then you go with your nothingness, can I say.

Things that I lived is conected with all shit of world with the void. M

September

--The words can't explain the secret sense-- Herman Hesse.

The first saw you I had a foreboding what never forget,  and thought when I could to see you again. When the world found us again this same feeling took me away from you. From us. What the could never be: A feeling. M

Sunday evening

Walking next to you, listening your voices

Moon grows

Why did you decide to stay?

I don't say anything but I pushed you three times at the vacuum and you're still here, with me, and watching the moon grows.  M

A bad feeling

Is closer

comes to the world

I feel the vibrations travel through time

fight or flight. M

When I feel for u

Into the crowd, we looked

our eyes, I was waiting for you

my heart, my hands, his hands

when I feel for you

is real. M

Fake poem

-

Sometimes when my light is weakened, you turn me on, when my petals closed trying to find myself, you give me back, because your voice and your thoughts they are shortcut to me. M

Dark creatures

I don't know how to start, I'm sweaty

open my eyes, there are others

I feel it

dark creatures surround me

to touch darkness or she has touched me

once told me, no matter where you hide, will find you

I don't know when it started, but always ends the same way.

In a white canvas & water. M

Living

The worst thing: Empty

The words in my mind run fast

but the time more.

I'm running, but I'm falling apart

all the questions, all the answers

I won't know

resurfacing in the time without have it

I sliding down the cliff and reborn

with the same melancholic inspiration. M

trance

--Cuanto más abstracta es una obra, mas interpretaciones se pueden hacer de ella. Cada espectador sacará algo distinto, justamente como ante el cuadro. Siempre seré fiel a mis ideas abstractas-- David Lynch.

Taza con ginebra

Relieves

Sujeta de mi. M

Plum tree

Sometimes a kiss from you is a fresh swallow of mint tea, 

others it's a glass of hot rum.

I going to distill my blood, cut my veins, 

before you finish cutting my jugular.

I'm going to cut my veins

I going to distill my blood, will paint my lips.

It they will stab your heart. M

Pink my heart

"Only unreachable love can be eternally romantic"

When he left, a needle sting my heart

but knew it would be unavoidable, your march

I stood in the doorway, watching him entering his car,

waiting for he turn right over to me, waiting

When I remember you, & your love, I feel the needle, a prick

pricking, pricking  my heart

& my arteries dilate

Look back, look back, I love you.

I want to love someone so much that makes me want to be dead for feeling so alive, so close.

Lying on your chest, I want feel your needles cross my skin & intertwine in my heart.

Look back, look back, I love you

Standing in the doorway. M

Infinity

No puedo despertar, estoy en una realidad profunda, if awake i will be dead, cuando camino y el viento se escabulle entre mi cabello lo siento real, pero todo se destruye y se va construyendo, estamos en el vacìo. ------------- irrealidades infinitas te atrapan y luego te masacran. Que no te extrañe no verme. M

Riddle

-- Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer -- William S. Burroughs.

Cuando te miro, me deja una sensación fría y puntiaguda. 

Como si mirara al rio, lo miro fijamente, el agua es transparente.

Transparente y oscura. 

Es mucho decir que no confió en ti

pero por alguna razón me he quedado mirando demasiado al rio. M

Lover

I stay awake tonight, wait to see you come, come the love

With my eyes open, my heart is pounding.

It's a strange feeling, How many eyes do you have to look before to be able to recognize love?

I want him to be the rain and my tears in his spit

I want an explosion. M

Wind time

One leaf, 

floating in the air, 

falling dense, 

into transparent waves,

 dissipating,

 coming to no-end. M

Lust

You stalk me, 

slide to me, sink into my pain, immerse yourself in agony,

crumble the sadness, swing it between the senses, outline the sweet song of pleasure, but never read me, because I will erase myself from your thoughts like a beautiful ghost without spirit, without density, with nothing. M

The rose

My rose wilthed after one day.

I don't want to talk about love

I've seen your ghost in my dreams with my eyes open

I didn't want you to find me or love me 

I wanted to be seen as I am

but you're so fake, I could see your ashes walk.

Am water, I am air

You'll never see me, 

I want to be sensed, touched

& may your brain smells me.

My rose arrived half dead between your lips

I will say you goodbye without say it, 

I never came and never went. M

☾

Distorted perceptions ☾☾☾. M

Moonlight

Clear lights, I went back to the pathway, in a dreams, darkness bathes me of wonderful encounters, it's a lie, I don't seek you, we don't found us, inside, I can't find me, you're lost, & I can't save me in the desert night, lonely ghosts, golden tears, sighs violets, wild laughter, hidden smells, strange life. Profuse, distant moon. M

Music on ♩

We feel it

I start to dance

the music is playing

I dance it, you can feel it?

Ripping into you

You have gone mad, go crazy 

Leap, leap, leap, leap it, leap all

♩ Music on ♫

Forget it, get it out, get it out, kick it

until disappear

I feel it

In my veins

Taste it

and go away. M

Butterfly rebirth

''Transformation isn't sweet and bright. it's a dark and murky, painful pushing. An unraveling of the untruths you've carried in your body. A practice in facing your own created demons. A complete uprooting before becoming.'' - Victoria Erickson.

Transiting in new realities on world and within us, I didn't want change, but were murdering me, and among them I saw me, hitting myself, breaking each of my bones. I was jumping off the cliff, again and again, but only inside my mind: run away. 

I Grow up and withered, now I know that just have this: a moment. Then, awake in another life, it start over, I pick up the pieces of my past lives by my intuition: feelings. 

To die, die and die out, but I can't see me in my other moment: dimensions. Scattered, incomplete, chipped, I run towards: myself.
To save me. M